Grinch Hunting- day twenty-three

Grinch therapy

     Hey everyone! I just had an amazing idea today.
     I've been needing to hunt down Grinches more and more recently as Christmas is almost here, so I'd been thinking- Who knows more about Grinches than anybody? 
     After some thinking, I had three answers. First of all, me- the semi-obsessed Grinch hunting guy who's been at it for years! My second answer was the Whos. They lived just south of the first known Grinch and probably know more about them than most anyone else. Third of all (this one took some thought), were...

THE GRINCHES THEMSELVES!!! 

     Now I may or may not know what you may or may or may not be thinking, but it totally works! If I can get some Grinches on my side, they can rat out all of the other Grinches, along with giving me their weaknesses. 

     Now, of course, the problem lies in getting Grinches on my side.

     Grinches are the nastiest of creatures and would never help a poor Grinch Hunter like me. Unless, of course, I somehow convince them to get it. Perhaps, I thought, the Whos have a secret amulet of sorts that can bring the Grinch onto their side! 

     It seemed to work with the first known Grinch soon after he tried to rob all of the Whos of their presents a long time ago. But, of course, how are Whos going to have some sort of amulet. 

     Then, suddenly, it hit me! The Whos don't use an amulet, they have MAGICAL SINGING (or something).

     Now I don't know for sure it it's the Who's singing or the specific song, so the next time I'm up against a Grinch unarmed I can use that as a potential defense, but until then, everything leads up to finding the Whos. However, this might be a problem considering how they are very, very, very small. But either way, it doesn't hurt to try.

      Now, to find the Whos, I'm going to need someone who knows a lot about the Whos. Now I thought again to myself, Who knows most about Whos. This time the answer was obvious- Whos! Now all I need is to find... some...  Whos. 

Oh.

     So I tried again; Who knows most about Whos besides Whos. After a while another answer came to me- elephants!

     Now I just gotta catch a plane to Africa, and I'm on my way to hunting more Grinches than ever before.

Grinch Hunting- day twenty-two

Grinch Tracker

     Hello everybody! I'm back again!

     Unfortunately for me and the human in Grinch-related danger, nobody told me of any Grinch sightings yesterday, but you still let me know of any sightings anytime help make the world a better Grinch-free place.
     But until then, I've been trying to track down Grinches, starting with the one in prison of whom's picture I showed you yesterday. I tracked the picture down to it's source, where the reporter and probably photographer wrote a very short paragraph about how the article he wrote. But that's where the trail ended when I clicked his link to the article, and... nothing. *faints*
     The page was...
EMPTYYYYYY!!!
     Well now I'm starting to feel suspicious. The potential culprit's name, or so he said, was Stefan Hartman, and if you know anything about this guy, report it to me immediately. Perhaps... this guy is a Grinch himself!!!

That would be scary.

     Oh well. Either way, as of right now, the trail ends here, so I guess I'm going to have to start looking somewhere else. Let you know how it goes tomorrow!

Grinch Hunting- day twenty-one

Doin' My Thing

     Hello again!!!

     I've been doing some poking around, as all Grinch Hunters must do, and I found this...

 

...and I suddenly became very worried. As you can see (unless you cannot see) this Grinch is in jail. However, it seems that he is, in fact, up to no good. I know my job is hunting Grinches, but perhaps as a side career I should make sure they stay in jail too. 

ATTENTION ALL!!!

     If you know of any Grinches in your neighborhood, in prison or otherwise, let me know, and I just might come and do my thing. In fact, if you know of any Grinches anywhere out of custody inform me immediately!

THANK YOU

Grinch Hunting- day TWENTY!!!!

Grinch Hunter Reawakened

     ALAS, it is Christmas time once more, and I have been reawakened to do what I do best-

HUNTING GRINCHES!!!

     And so, I knew I had to get down to business. I would like some help on this, so give me advice in the comments, but until then, I'm going at this alone. On Grinch Hunting day 18, I told you guys about how I found out about how the Grinch was sighted in Elora, Ontario, and even sent you guys the video proof. I calculated the route and travel distance, but I never really decided whether to go.
     Also, I was searching for a laser gun from space, and I was looking into signing up for NASA. Now, if I'm going to catch a Grinch, I really need to get into action. Hopefully my hibernation put the Grinches off guard, so I'm ready for action, baby!

Grinch Hunting- day nineteen

Poetry and Commenting

     Today is... you guessed it:

POETRY SATURDAY!!!

     Poetry Saturday! You know, every week you can post poems in the comments section and you will almost defiantly get your poems posted. You can also post comments telling me how to make my blog better. I am happy to improve my blog the way you want it too.

     One more thing- it seems at least one of you four told your friends about this blog (see Grinch Hunting, day twelve), and now I'm getting a steady bit more posts every day (within a minute after I post, too). 

     Well, without further ado, we have: 

POETRY SATURDAY!!!

The Amazing Grinch Hunter

BY ORANGE NOSTRIL

The Amazing Grinch Hunter

Always knows what he is doing.

Whether if it's going to space,

To get a laser gun,

Or relating to Grinch Hunting Day 5!

He truly is awesome.

When you see him shoot his gun.

He's able to track Grinches down,

Like he did a couple of days ago.

He even figured out, how long it will take!

He's so super cool,

And also pretty hot.

Perhaps pretty soon,

He'll fly out to space.

He'll get a laser gun,

And blast back to earth.

And jump on a Grinch,

And pull out it's heart.

And tear off it's limbs,

And unscrew it's head,

And finish him off

With a big laser gun!

He'll sell the parts to

People everywhere.

He will make so much money

And be super cool,

To have acutally hunted...

A GRINCH!!!!

Yeah.

     Whoa, I'm good at poetry. I should probably make the next two poem shorter, though. 

     I kinda liked that poem, though it seemed kind of like an ad.

     Yep, definitely an ad.

Grinch Hunting- day eighteen

Grinch Found!!!

     Today I decided that since nobody has told me about their Grinch sightings I will find them myself!

     On...

     Well searching on Google I found some good things, and I found this: 

The Grinch sighted in Elora, Ontario

     Well guess what? Now I'm searching for plane tickets to Elora, Ontario.

     Now I just found this: http://www.rome2rio.com. 

     Now, I looked it up and it will take two days, seven hours, and ten minutes. Now I'm seriously starting to consider if it will be worth it. I'll tell you next time if I decide to go, or if I'm there. 

Grinch Hunting- day seventeen

Poetry Makeup Day

   Crap, I forgot to do...

Poetry Saturday!!! 

     Last Saturday. Well, the votes were 2:0, and I even got one poem to share, so here it is.

Your mom is cool,

She likes to eat.

She drives in cars,

And eats at kitchen bars.

     That poem reminds me of my first poem. It goes like this:

4-Square

Four square is fun,

A sandwich in a bun.

Four square is best,

It wins every test.

     Okay, even though only one person posted a poem in the comments section when I asked everyone to, I still promised to share three poems today (yesterday). Well, let's make the last one about Grinch Hunting. Looking on the internet, I found something good. Here it is:

Mr. Grinch 

Your a mean one,

Mr. Grinch.

You really are a heel.

You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel,
Mr. Grinch.
You're a bad banana with a...

 greasy black peel!

You're a monster,

Mr. Grinch.   

You're heart's an empty hole.

You're brain is full of spiders,

You've got Garlic in you're soul,

 Mr. Grinch.

I Wouldn't touch you with a...

39 1/2 foot pole!

You're a  foul one, Mr. Grinch.
You're a nasty wasty skunk.
Your heart is full of unwashed socks.
Your soul is full of gunk,
Mr Grinch.

The three best words that best describe you,
Are as follows, and I quote"
Stink!
Stank!
Stunk!

You're a rotter Mr Grinch
You're the king of sinful sots
Your heart's a dead tomato squashed with moldy purple spots
Mr Grinch

Your sole is a appalling dump heap
Overflowing with the most disgraceful
Assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots.

You nauseate me, Mr Grinch
With a noxious super-naus
You're a crooked jerky jockey and,
You drive a crooked horse
Mr Grinch!

You're a three-decker sauerkraut
And toadstool sandwich,
With arsenic sauce!

     That... is the perfect description of a Grinch that I've been looking for. You're heart's a dead tomato squashed with moldy purple spots! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Uh, I mean... lol.

 

 

Grinch Hunting- day sixteen

Something Awesome

     Okay I told you I was coming back, and don't worry, I think I am. Something even more awesome is coming. It will be there soon. It may or may not be about Grinch Hunting, so, I am going to Grinch Hunt today. 

     Today I thought: If I want a missile why don't I type in 'www.missle.com' and see what happens? So I did. I got a weird looking page that was a big categorized list. The categories were:

Chat & Dating
Career and Education
Transportation
Computers and Technology
Entertainment and Arts
Travel
Buisness and Finance
Shopping & Gifts
Home & Lifestyle
Astrology & Psychic
Wholesale & Auction
Games
Health & Fitness
Weight Loss
Free Everything 

     Now, I have a number of things to say to that. First of all, what the heck does weight loss got to do with missiles!? Or dating!? Some of the things looked helpful for a minute, like shopping, or maybe career, until I saw the subcategories under each. 

     I think I'll just give up for the day.

Grinch Hunting- day fifteen

Honesty

     I'm sorry I haven't been posting recently (again) (again) but I literally went to England for a week and didn't get back till noon yesterday. Have I ever lied to you on this blog? Even once? (Seriously, I haven't lied to you once on this blog. I bet you can't even tell me one time on this blog I've lied to you. You probably will, but I will respond to any comment explaining why whatever was not a lie. That last statement was not a lie either.) I have not.

     Well. Maybe I should come back with something drastic to make up for the week I missed. I'll get back to y'all viewers later. By then I will probably have something AWESOME to come back to you with.

SOMETHING AWESOME!!!

Yeah!!!

     Well, see ya then.

Grinch Hunting- day fourteen

Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

     It's Saturday again!!!

POETRY SATURDAY!!!

     Darn it's only Friday. Well, TGIF, I guess. (Why!)  

     Well, it HAS been fourteen days of Grinch hunting and I haven't had a grilled cheese sandwich until today. They sure are tasty, even when slightly burnt. Did you know there are (apparently) three ways to make a grilled cheese sandwich? Well there are. It says so on Wikipedia. See, right here.

http://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Grilled-Cheese-Sandwich!!!!!!!

     I bet you can't tell me one time Wikipedia has been wrong.

Grinch Hunting- day thirteen

Results

     Wow, somebody's a new fan of this blog. Ten comments in one day. Plus I seemed to have gotten 39 page reviews today, and I haven't even posted yet...

until now.

     Anyways, looking through my comments... looks like somebody else wants me to do Poetry Saturday. Funny comment last Saturday. Well, the results are in and it's 2:0. So I will continue to do Poetry Saturday. Also... looking at the same comment... I got one poem!!! You can look at it in the comments, but I'm not going to put it up here until Saturday. Unless three more poems come that are better than it. Better post soon. (Post on Grinch Hunting- day eleven.) Right before I post next Saturday I'm going to look at and judge all of the poems there. If you don't like the poem that's there, just the more reason to post one up, so you can beat it and have me not post it. 

     I'll go back to Grinch Hunting tomorrow.

Grinch Hunting- day twelve

Voting

     Wow, I'm sorry from yesterday. I didn't realize the type didn't turn white as it's supposed to. Oh well, I fixed it so you can read yesterday's post now too. I actually had to turn the type white. You can still comment on yesterday since you didn't read big parts of it, I see. Anyways, I'm still seriously going to post three of your poems. I'll have it be preferably about Grinches or Grinch hunting, but I guess it doesn't really have to be, if that's what stopping you from sending in poems (for more information, look at Grinch hunting, day eleven).

     It's Sunday today, and if any of you haven't seen Grinch Hunting- day four, then you won't know that I don't hunt for Grinches on Sunday. So, about my blog. Using my supreme power as blog owner, I have seen that at least four people look at it. I'm assuming that they are the four same people. Tell me if I'm right. Actually, as I fixed the color five minutes ago, looking right now... two people have already looked at it. More people look at it, but not on a daily bases. Once I got fifty. Anyways, tell your friends, because I'm trying to get more. I'll tell you if it improves.

Grinch Hunting- day eleven

Poems

    Wow, is it Saturday already?

POETRY SATURDAY!!!

    I told you I was seriously going to do this Poetry Saturday thing if people wanted me to. I got one comment that day from Neth110 saying ‘Woooo’, which I take for a yes. If you want me to not do this next week, say no. If you want me to continue, say ‘yes’ or I guess a ‘wooo’ would suffice. I’m going to compare, and counting the ‘wooo’ from last week, I’m going to tally the votes and tell you the results tomorrow, so comment below.

    Anyways, like I promised: POETRY SATURDAY!!!

Grinch Hunting

Delicate process.

Only for pros and bloggers.

Totally awesome.

Grinches

Hideously green,

They Destroy Christmas for Whos,

And kidnap people.

    Hooray for haikus! Maybe I can do another type of poem next Saturday (depending on the vote, of course). In fact, maybe you can send in poems of your own (any type). Put them in the comments section and I’ll post three next week (again, depending on the vote). Yay poetry.

Grinch Hunting- day ten

Grinch Sightings

     Today I saw something green. Perhaps it was a Grinch! Apparently it was just a flashlight. A solar powered flashlight. Pretty cool, eh. 

     Thinking about it, there have been little to no times I've seen a Grinch. I'll try to think of all the few times I have seen a Grinch, and you tell me the number of Grinches you've seen and where. Maybe I can go hunt them there. I'll do it for free, because, like I said yesterday, I can make a lot of money off of a Grinch. In fact, adding it up, considering all of the variables, I could make about four hundred and eighty one dollars for each fully intact Grinch. 

     Actually, if I'm planning to sell all of the Grinches I capture, I'll need to think over my whole laser gun plan. Darn, I had it all thought out and everything. I did so much to get that laser gun! (See Grinch Hunting- day three.) Oh well, maybe I will have to go the eight minutes to 'Mr. Guns- Guns and Ammo' to get regular human guns. How distasteful.

Grinch Hunting- day nine

Grinch Parts

     Today I am hungry. Although it's only 8:30 AM, I still haven't eaten anything all day. Maybe I should go eat some breakfast now.

*   *   *

     Okay, I'm back now. I just had some toast, and I'm feeling good.

     Anyways, Grinch hunting. I have recently been wondering what I will do when I kill a Grinch. At first I thought- simple- blast it to smithereens! (See Grinch Hunting- day five.) However, I soon began to wonder... what will one buy for Grinch blood, or a Grinch heart (see Grinch Hunting- day eight)- it would go well in some soups. So I'm making a list of what I will get from a Grinch and how much it would probably be worth.

• Grinch blood... $30 a gallon.
• Grinch ears... $4000 an ear.
• Grinch boogers... $-12 a nostril.
• Grinch heart... $1 per heart.
• Grinch saliva,,, $15 per spit.
• Grinch fat... $4 per fat Grinch.
• Grinch foot... $35 per foot.
• Grinch limb... $5 per limb.
• Grinch screw-on head... $50 per head.

     That's about everything. Of course, there are a few problems for a few of the things, like how Grinches don't have ears, and how their acid-spit will need to be sold to the army to get $15 out of it, but besides that, I'm pretty good off. 

     Now all I need to do is to catch a Grinch.

Grinch Hunting- day eight

How the Grinch Stole Christmas

     Today is Sunday again, and like last week, I'm not going to be Grinch Hunting Today. I know the date says 'Saturday, July 12th, but I had to fix something. However, I can still be talking and thinking and craving about Grinches, though. I bet some of you have started to wonder what is a Grinch, despite my background repeating picture. Well, if you haven't read 'How the Grinch Stole Grinches' then you should. It will be a perfect example of those smelly green Grinches always trying to do things like destroy Christmas. 

     Do you know the actual ending of that book? Well I'll tell you. In the real end, when he heart grows, it explodes, destroying the Grinch and blasting the sleigh of presents of the cliff. Do you know why the Grinch's heart exploded? It exploded because Grinches naturally have a small and therefore worthless heart full of evil. When his heart grew it burst his rib cage and made a small explosion. Actually, in the end, the explosion caused an avalanche and crushed the city.

     Anyways, that's what a Grinches is. If you find one: run, let me hunt them, and never try to give it actual emotions if you plan to survive. Those Whos should've let their presents be pushed over the cliff.

Grinch Hunting- day seven

  Poetry Saturday

     To bad it's not Sunday today, because I feel like not Grinch Hunting Today. Maybe Saturday can be Poetry Saturday.

POETRY SATURDAY!!!

yay!

     Nah, sounds stupid. In the comments section, why don't you tell me just how stupid this sounds, because if y'all find this to be a good idea, I just might just might just might do it. But if y'all think like me then you will say 'no' in the comments section. You can say a simple 'no'. Or a bit more polite 'I think you shouldn't', or you can be like most people on the internet and say 'That's the #%%$# worst @#$#@# idea I've even %$^#@ heard'. I hope you stick to a bit more polite version, though.

Grinch Hunting- day six

  Posting

     Again, I''m so sorry that I have not been posting. I had to go on a two day car trip to Utah! I spend about five days and I've been going long times without internet connections. I will try to post more- two to seven times at a week, but not eight times. If I post eight times a week chances are I will be tracked down by Grinches and I don't have my laser gun quite yet.
     Once I get a laser gun everything will change, though. If I get a laser gun...

If I get a laser gun

If I get a laser gun,

Everything will change,

If I get a laser gun, 

I will go on a range,

To hunt for Grinches

Every second of every day,

and rip the Grinches apart,

and show them 

that this is not a terrible and pointless blog.

AND THE END OF ALL GRINCHES WILL OCCUR!!!

 I hope.

 

Grinch Hunting- day five

Killing Grinches

     I'm sorry for not posting recently. I was kidnapped  by Grinches when I was trying to hunt them. I tried and tried to free myself from the ropes that bound my to the wooden post inside their cave. I tried to silently free my hand from the ropes so I could cut myself free. I tried for a day and a half before I could painfully rip my hand from the impossibly tight ropes. I reached for my knife for the rest of the day, at least, for it was hard to tell time in the cave.
     Eventually I was free! I jumped up and grabbed my laser gun, but the Grinches were gone. Then, suddenly, the Grinches attacked me from behind! I was knocked down, but I was able to turn and shoot them into dust. When I came out of the cave I realized that I hadn't been posting for multiple days! I figured the only thing I could do was to explain what happened and hope you'd understand.
     Either that happened, or I just forgot. But what are the chances that that's what happened...

Grinch hunting- day four

Not Grinch Hunting

      Today I decided not to go Grinch hunting on Sundays, for moral and sanity reasons. The moral reasons I've decided to do it, is because this is church day and stuff. The sanity reasons I don't do it is something nobody knows, for I'm probably insane. Anyways, today I ate seven pizzas. Or did I? I'm very mysterious that way.
     Oh well, since I'm not Grinch hunting, want to check out my awesome video? It it about Grinch hunting. I actually kill a Grinch and record it. I did it today!!!

HERE' THE LINK TO SEE THE VIDEO

     Ha, ha. It was actually not Grinch hunting! I told you I don't hunt Grinches on Sunday!!! I can't believe you fell for that. Anyways, comment on YouTube or this blog if you have something to say about my little trick. He, he, he. However, subscribe if you liked it or not. Anyways, I've almost published another video too. 

     Watch it,

     Like it,

     Subscribe to it.

     Ha, I sound like a Bop-it.