Grinch Hunting- day three

Applying for NASA

     Okay, as you all know, I'm having trouble buying weapons online, and I don't feel like going anywhere to get one, so, perhaps I should try using something else. Maybe, instead of going the eight minutes to the nearest gun store (eight minutes, looked it up), I could go the seven light-years till a find a planet with laser guns!!! Everyone knows that seven is less than eight under any circumstances. Just see Shel Silverstein's amazing poem 'Smart'. It goes like this:

 

My dad gave me one dollar bill

'Cause I'm his smartest son,

And I swapped it for two shiny quarters

'Cause two is more than one!

My dad gave me one dollar bill

'Cause I'm his smartest son,

And I swapped it for two shiny quarters

'Cause two is more than one!

Just then, along came old blind Bates

And just 'cause he can't see

He gave me four nickels for my three dimes,

And four is more than three!

And I took the nickels to Hiram Coombs

Down at the seed-feed store,

And the fool gave me five pennies for them,

And five is more than four!

And then I went and showed my dad,

And he got red in the cheeks

And closed his eyes and shook his head--

Too proud of me to speak!

     You see my point? Under any circumstances. Therefore, I guess I should order a rocket. So I looked it up on Google Shops. I typed in spaceship, but, like on the 19th, all I got was completely unrelated stuff like stupid spaceship inner tubes, or T shirts!!! I was enraged. Maybe I could get a rocket from another distant planet, but then again, how will I get there? It was like the entire world was against me, and I wanted to blow it up, with all of those stupid Grinches with it. 

     Then it came to me; maybe I should join NASA! I quickly went back to Google and typed in 'how to apply for NASA'. It WORKED!!! The fourth result was exactly what I needed! It brought me to the NASA website, and there was a link on the page that said 'If you've graduated from college or are in the military, and you're ready to apply, here's how.'

     Okay, so I haven't graduated from college and I'm not in the military. I was sure they'd understand, though, once I told them I just wanted to kill Grinches, so I clicked the link.